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Other moms have welded-into-place hair, understand what a purse is for and can juggle ballet lessons over Jell-O frog making with a dexterity that leaves me agog. Other moms can whip up a batch of cookies like lightning and smile kindly at me when I don't offer to bake for the school fair - at least I think they smile kindly, those expressions could be of relief, though...

My domestic skills are nonexistent; I have two settings on my oven. "Off" and "Incinerate". Not only can I not cook but also, needlework is just a mythology in my house. Ask my long-suffering son, who has just spent two years at school with his coat badge firmly affixed with iron-on tape. This was after I realized it was not an iron-on badge and had spent 35 minutes with a hot iron, a damp cloth and a puzzled expression trying to work out why the thing would not adhere to his coat... Although I confess to attempting jelly frog juggling at one point. The outcome was not good and for the sake of the faint hearted, I will spare you the details.

Disasters and chaos are something that we have grown to live with around here. Those "little things" in life, which are sent to try us, are Beta tested on me first. Two of those "little things" are my darling children who, having given up trying to get any sense out of me at all, have taken to leaving me notes. I often find them on my bed, taped to my computer monitor (well, I'll be sure to see it there <g>) and even in the bathroom (note: I seldom find them in the kitchen...). One such offering from my daughter, which I found tucked into the pocket of my gym bag, simply read:

Have a good day! Well pigs might fly.

That sums it up really. If it’s going to happen, it will happen to me. So, take heart - if you are not one of the other moms, chances are you’ll find situations here that are very familiar indeed and some that are so far-fetched, you’ll have trouble believing they really happened at all. However, I can assure you they did; everything here is a true story. Trust me - nobody would make this stuff up…