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Ask Parry! is a service where Parry Aftab, noted online safety and privacy expert, and Executive Director of WiredSafety.org can answer your questions about online safety, privacy and security, and help you with problems you encounter online. Anything from help finding a safe chat room for your teens, to knowing what to do if the item you bought at auction doesn't arrive as promised.
How do I know when my child is ready to use the Internet?
That depends on your child. There is no "one size fits all" answer here. When our children access certain areas online and take part in certain activities, they face greater risks. These may be fun and valuable experiences once your child is ready to handle them, but they are not without their risks, and the risks vary depending on the children's age and how well prepared they are. It also depends on how well they follow your rules.
Your children shouldn't be allowed online unsupervised until you are sure that they know the rules and will follow them. Fancy child protection software shouldn't be used as a substitute for parental supervision. You also need to set the rules and administer your own test, one designed just for your child and your family. Only you can make sure your child is ready.
Remember to adjust the rules as they grow and earn more trust. As parents, we help our children handle increased risks every day. It's called growing up. We use training wheels when our children first learn to ride a bike, don't we? Then, when we think they're ready, we teach them how to balance a bike without training wheels. But we watch them, run alongside the bike, and pick them up when they inevitably crash into a tree. Eventually, we let them ride the bike alone, and later ride it downtown. By the time they get to the fifty-mile runs, they don't need us anymore.
The Internet is no different.
Screen e-mail when your kids are younger and sit with them while they're in any non-child unsupervised chat rooms. Make sure they know the chat room rules, too, and where to report violations and things that make them feel uncomfortable.
So, when is a child ready? When his/her Internet-savvy parent thinks so.