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Photograph of Parry Aftab, Executive Director of WiredSafetyParry Aftab
Parry Aftab, an Internet privacy and security lawyer, is WiredSafety's Executive Director. Parry is The Privacy Lawyer columnist for Information Week magazine.More...
Ask Parry! FAQ

What are the risks our children face online?

How can I teach my children about risks online if I have never used the Internet?

How can I tell if something is dangerous to my child or merely offensive?

I hear that the Internet is loaded with criminals. Is that true?

I think that the only way to keep your children safe is to keep them offline. Is that true?

O.K.ay, you convinced me. But I'm not a techie, and I can't even program my VCR. How can I supervise my children online?

I hear there are no laws in cyberspace. Is that true?

I'm afraid that my children will be kidnapped or molested by someone they meet online. How serious a risk is that?

How do I know when my child is ready to use the Internet?

How do I encourage my child to come to me with questions and when things go wrong online?

I taught my children about "Stranger Danger." But how does this work when you're supposed to talk with strangers online?

My children and teens want to chat online, but I hear it's dangerous. What should I do?

My kids don't chat online, but they use Instant Messaging all the time. Is that a problem?

I trust my child not to get into trouble. Is that a mistake?

Who's at risk? Is there a profile of a typical child victim of Internet-related sexual molestation?

How can you find out what information is posted online about your child?

Is there a profile of a typical predator?

My children know not to talk to strangers. I have been teaching them about stranger-danger for many years. I don't believe they would be lured into talking to a predator online. How does this happen?

What is the likelihood of my child meeting an online predator offline? Should I be worried?

My children attend a school that has a Web site They have posted the names and photos of the students at the site. Is that a problem?

What can I do to help my child avoid being a victim of an Internet sexual molester?

What about filtering and blocking software and parental controls? Do they keep your child safe?

What about technology…are there products to help you snoop on your child?

Should I snoop on my children?

Maybe I should just keep them from using the Internet entirely.

But what can I do if I don't understand computers or technology? My children know more than I do about the Internet.

So, what can I do to make my children more Internet-safety-savvy?

What do I do if I suspect my child is involved with an Internet sexual predator?

Whom do I contact to report an Internet sexual predator?

My child told me about their encounters online with someone I suspect is a sexual molester. I understand you want me to report it to law enforcement. But what do I do if I don't want to get law enforcement involved?

What do I do if my child is missing and I suspect that an Internet sexual molester is involved?

Which law enforcement agencies in the United States handle cybercrimes?

What kinds of things are teens really doing online?

I suspect that teens act out online. Is that true?

What's your favorite and most important safety tip?

Ask Parry!

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Ask Parry! Ask Parry! is a service where Parry Aftab, noted online safety and privacy expert, and Executive Director of WiredSafety.org can answer your questions about online safety, privacy and security, and help you with problems you encounter online. Anything from help finding a safe chat room for your teens, to knowing what to do if the item you bought at auction doesn't arrive as promised.

There are six types of risks our children face online

1. They can access information that might be inappropriate for them. This includes pornography, hate, intolerance, bigotry, gore, violence, hoaxes, and misinformation and hype.

2. They can access information, do things, and purchase products that might be dangerous to them. There are sites that offer bomb-building recipes, sites that sell guns, alcohol, poisons, tobacco products and drugs, and sites that offer gambling online.

3. They can be stalked and harassed by people (often other children) who are rude, insulting, and make threats, or may send them viruses or hack their computers.

4. They can give up important and private information by filling out forms and entering contests online, and, as a result, be targeted by irresponsible marketers using unfair marketing techniques.

5. They can be scammed or defrauded when they buy things online, and risk disclosing our important financial information to others, like credit card and pin numbers and passwords.

6. They can be lured by cyberpredators who want to meet them face-to-face.

If you look over this list, you'll see that all but two of the risks are within our children's control. Except when they stumble inadvertently on certain content, they can avoid information that is either inappropriate or dangerous. They can also refuse to fill out forms and registrations online or make sure the information they provide is okayed by you and is being treated responsibly by the entities that collect it.

Only cyberstalkers, harassers, and cyberpredators are outside of their control. And until someone develops the "Beam me up, Scotty!" technology or ways to shrink our children so they can pass through the modem lines, your child has to agree to meet them, or has to give them information about where they can be found offline, to be really at risk.

I'll give you tips on how to avoid these risks online, but you need to deal with the fact that your children might be intentionally accessing inappropriate sites, doing dangerous things, and putting themselves at risk. That's the nature of children. (It's especially the nature of teenagers!)

Don't worry, though. We can help you gain more control over what your children do online and teach you how to help them exercise critical thinking and make informed judgments. But in order for you to be able to educate your children about online risks, you need to learn about them first. (I'll try to make this as painless as possible.)

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Parts of this Web site were taken from Parry Aftab's book The Parent's Guide to Protecting Your Children in Cyberspace. Marvel and all character names and the distinctive likenesses thereof are trademarks of Marvel Characters, Inc., and are used with permission. TM & © 2004 Marvel Characters, Inc. All rights reserved. www.marvel.com. Super Heroes is a Co-owned registered Trademark.
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